The Meaning of the Word Obsession

Lying awake thinking of him, dreaming of him when you fall asleep, waking up between dreams, thinking of him, reminding yourself that he’s probably making love to someone else at that precise moment, getting up, thinking of him.
Spending the day alternating praying he contacts you, and telling yourself to ‘get a life, he won’t’.
Not understanding why he doesn’t feel your whole being screaming for him across the ether. Not understanding how he can not feel the same.
Losing more weight in a 3 week period than in a year of work-outs, cos the smell of food makes you nauseous. Drinking too much coffee to fill the gap left by not eating, shaking before you overload of coffee, shaking more after you overload on coffee.
Forgetting your words cos you’re thinking of him while trying to have a conversation with someone else.
Not being able to listen to your CD’s, cos you shared them with him. Not being able to pet your dogs without thinking of him, cos he liked them, too. Not being able to cook certain dishes, cos you make them for him.
Not being able to light candles, cos fire makes you think of him.
Seeing cars that could potentially be him, everywhere.
Giving up on the idea of having anyone in your life, cos if it’s not him, it can’t be someone else.
Having a cold spot between your shoulder blades, that just does not heat up. Hurting all the time.
Telling yourself to move on, and start living again, while praying to die.